i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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