wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
