Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
