we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
