But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I will pee on everything he values.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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