Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
