i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I deserve this hangover.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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