So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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