Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
