Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize