just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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