we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
