that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
