when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
