She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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