My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
