is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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