You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
