Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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