Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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