nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
