I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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