so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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