I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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