i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
