Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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