I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
