Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Just high enough for therapy.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
