she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
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