If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
