Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
