Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize
