And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
