i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
