I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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