So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize