last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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