the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
