Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
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