I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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