He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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