Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
he fucked my hip out of place.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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