Pants 0. Shit 1.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
