I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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