i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
BRING THE BAGELS
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
