It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
