either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I don't deserve a penis
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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