I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Randomize