I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
