so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
