i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Randomize
