You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize